If there is someone not cover her hair again in public, the first question that should be asked (if you dare and care to ask) is not “Kenapa dilepas?” but “Awalnya dulu kenapa dipakai?” If there’s nothing wrong in the beginning, so the problem should be along the way. In my case, it’s already in the beginning, so I kinda difficult to answer “Kenapa dilepas?”
Kalau kenapa awalnya dulu pakai, jawabannya gampang: Syariat Islam di Aceh. I come from Aceh, where every girl there MUST wear veil, if they don’t want their hair being cut or to get other punishment from Polisi Syariah. In my opinion, kerudung disana dianggap sebagai budaya, dimana cewe-cewe ga boleh keluar rumah dengan pakaian seronok (kalau pakai baju minim 2 kali jadi 2 ronok *halah*). Kalo cuma ke warung deket rumah atau bertandang ke rumah tetangga atau ada saudara berkunjung ke rumah (meskipun bukan muhrim) ya preman aja ga pake kerudung. Kalo jalan-jalan ke Aceh coba liat deh cewe-cewenya pake baju agak nanggung.. pake kerudung iya tapi lengan baju pendek, atau poninya dikeluarin, atau rambut panjangnya muncul di belakang.. ajaib emang! Tapi ada juga yang pakai pakaian tertutup karena kesadaran sungguh-sungguh 🙂
When I was 15 years old, masih lucu-lucunya, I moved to Jakarta with family. Waktu itu sempet ada pembicaraan kecil (amat sangat kecil): “ntar ke sekolah tetep pakai kerudung ato engga”. Gw kan masih anak bau kencur, ga ngerti dandan cantik dan sebagainya, nyokap bilang “udah lah tetep pake kerudung aja, ribet nyari baju lain dan sayang baju nya ga dipakai lagi ntar..” (semacam itu lah) *kan ceritanya waktu itu baru pindahan* Ya udah bo, keputusan gw pake kerudung di Jakarta (seinget gw) cuma karena itu.
Ternyata oh ternyata, aturan kerudung di kota besar justru lebih ketat: apapun urusannya kalau ketemu yang bukan muhrim, ga boleh buka kerudung (eh itu aturan agama ya bukan kota besar :P). Ihiks aku terkekang dan terjebak, because it’s too taboo to open it after you wear it (I care too much of what people think, I know :|). Dulu waktu di Aceh I didn’t care much about it cause every girl wearing it. Tapi pas pindah ke Jawa gw jadi sirik banget ngeliat cewe-cewe lain yang ga pake kerudung, cuih. Dan gw ga alim-alim amat orangnya, serius deh biasa aja! Gw hapal lagu-lagu Rihanna, bukan nasyid. *ga nyambung* Ya mungkin gw belum dapet aja hidayahnya. Kalau gw membayangkan keesokan hari gw mungkin akan mati, gw nangis ampe banjir bandang. Gw merasa belum menikmati hidup, doing what I want to do, being myself.
When I was in college, I promised myself will move to other place after graduation, to the place where nobody knows me, so I can start my life all over again, without tudung. Trus gw udah pindah nihhh ke Singapore, but still get many friends who know me before. Gw ga berani buka. Trus tiba-tiba di kantor ada yang buka kerudung juga doooong.. ampir gw bawa pisau kan ke cubicle dia (to peel apple together *halah*) “You took my place bitch! I’ve already planned it long long time ago before you were born!” *lebay! Jadi Iprit, maapkeun saya, I had felt so much anger to you at that time*.
So the point is Saya lepas kerudung bukan karena pengaruh lingkungan di luar negeri. Dan Saya tidak ikut-ikutan siapapun. I never change, I simply become more myself. I don’t know why I should clarify this, in fact is I don’t care! I don’t care anymore with what people are gonna say about me. I never feel better than this. I feel free. I love myself and my life now 🙂
There, I write my confession. Have a nice life, everyone!